Do We Ever REALLY Graduate from High School?


Another birthday celebration come and gone!

 

This past week I celebrated another birthday. I say another birthday because it wasn’t a “big” birthday, it wasn’t a landmark birthday, simply a birthday that left me scratching my head and wondering, “Where has time gone?” It’s funny, I remember my Grandmother saying to me, “Don’t wish your life away, it moves quickly enough on its own.” I never really understood what it meant until I looked around and found my children grown, the veins in my hands more prominent and the wrinkles around my eyes deepening.

As I’ve gotten older, I hear more people say, “Ahh, to be young again.” Wait, beg your pardon? I am young!  I don’t know about you, but the thought of going back to my high school days would likely be akin to rubbing salt in a wound, no thanks.  It wasn’t that high school was horrible, quite the opposite,  it was the foundation of some of life’s most important lessons. (I just didn’t know it then!)

High school alma mater L.D. Bell High School

1. You will not always fit in.

2. You will not be the prettiest, skinniest and most popular, most people aren’t, and the ones that are don’t always live the life we perceive.

3. Some people are mean.

4. Some people are kind.

5. Some people try so hard to fit in.

6. You lose some “friends” to the cooler kids.

7. Don’t take yourself so seriously.

The funny thing is, as I write this list I realize that even as a grown adult these truths haven’t changed!  There’s still the cool crowd, still those that are prettier, thinner and more popular.  People can still be incredibly cruel, but people can also be incredibly kind. There are adults that  continue to try and fit in, and as an adult, I have lost friends to others that have something I don’t. C’est la vie!

But I smile because the beauty of now versus then is my world isn’t falling apart because of those realities. There are some situations where I still don’t fit in, so I don’t try. I’m no longer seeking to be the prettiest or the skinniest or more popular, funny perhaps, but at the end of day, the only person I have to please is moi.

Buzzin’ around

I care that I’m a good human being and the rest plays itself out. At this age when someone is mean, I don’t take it personally. I’ve learned that mean people have issues far deeper than I’ll ever understand, so I hope that they can one day find their happiness and peace.

For the kind people, ahhh, those are the unsung heroes. I could hang with those folks all day, and I try to. With all the crap going on in the world, when you meet someone genuinely kind, you want to “have what they’re having” and hope it sticks. I have such an appreciation for kind souls that I couldn’t comprehend back in high school. Those people are nice because they want to be, not because they have to be.

Of course as we grow up (I use that term loosely), there are the ladder climbers. Don’t get me wrong, I am an entrepreneur, I know the importance of climbing ladders, I just don’t break the rungs below me.

What I love most about getting to this point in life is that friends are finally a choice, not a prerequisite. I pick friends who make me feel happy when I’m around them, and I hope I provide the same.  I’m through with drama and gossip and all the other things that high school is known for. Unfortunately, there are still those who thrive on drama and gossip but it’s their choice, not mine. I can choose to walk away without fear of being kicked out of some club.

My friends are amazing, wonderful, smart and talented. The difference is that now I understand the real friends that I had in high school, and my real friends today are simply my mirror. Had I known that in high school, I would have appreciated myself so much more.

But I think the most valuable lesson I’ve learned is to ease up on myself. When I think about how cruel I was to myself in high school because I believed I always fell short, is nothing less than heartbreaking. But I suppose that’s what lessons are for. “Can’t go over it, can’t go under it, you’ve got to go through it.”  Going on a Bear Hunt- One of my favorite children’s books.

A favorite book of mine.

To get to a point in life, where you suddenly realize you’re pretty cool and have pretty cool family and pretty cool friends without worrying about how anyone else defines cool is just, well, cool.

I love laughing, especially at myself for all the right reasons. I’m less concerned with my shortcomings, and more impressed with my strengths. I guess the beauty of getting to this point in life is that I now understand graduating from high school was much more than simply getting through 4 years, I earned a diploma in valuable life lessons that have stayed with me.

As I celebrate another year kicking, another year with family and friends, the lessons I learned in high school are far more important than any diploma. High school was not about the academics of readin’, writin’ and ‘rithmatic, more the academics of life. Here’s to high school!

Here’s to never wishing for more time, rather making the most of it!

Nicki


6 responses to “Do We Ever REALLY Graduate from High School?”

  1. Nicki,

    This is just beautiful! I couldn’t agree with the words you’ve written more! Thank you for sharing your heart and for your amazing friendship!

    xo
    Cath

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