Nicki Anderson

Gray Expectations – 2

By Nicki On December 2, 2012 Under Aging and Activity, Aging Gracefully, Gray Expectations

Wow, wow, wow. Since posting my initial going gray journey, it’s been fascinating to read the responses both on Facebook and my blog. Some are shocked that I would even consider this, others would like to try it, but vanity prevents it. There are also a few that have never colored their hair, ever. In fact, they don’t understand why it’s even an issue.

Some of my friends have asked, “Now Nicki, why would you cover that gorgeous, thick brunette hair (now they tell me!) with dull, stringy gray?” While others have said, “Oh Nicki, don’t do that, you don’t want to do that.”  I felt like I was letting them down in some way. Perhaps there’s a woman code that I’m unknowingly breaking.  I suppose it just proves what a controversial topic going gray is.

But I keep going back to – if I feel fine with it, what difference does it make how others view it?  But I’m beginning to understand that I care more than I thought.

I mentioned in my last blog that age and old are not synonymous. Surely, you know someone in their 30’s that acts old, or someone in their 60’s that is energetic as well as, wait for it, wait for it……gray!  I am a true believer that it is your spirit that either ages you or makes you ageless. I bet we all know someone like that, despite their age or gray hair, their spirit is young and catching.

My kids tell me to, “Go for it.”  While my Aunt reacted as though I told her I was going to cut off my pinky toes to fit in to a pair of Jimmy Choo’s, “Oh you’re not really, are you? How can you do that?” Very interesting.

I see a few grays peeking through since my last color. Hmmm.

Here’s to a positive spirit that never tells your age!

Nicki

9 comments - add yours
Carmela Martino

December 2, 2012

I’m in the “never colored my hair and am letting it go gray camp.” I do feel a constant social pressure that I “should” cover the gray so that I’d look younger. But I resist because I really don’t want to invest that much time and energy into something that isn’t that important to me. (And I don’t like the idea of putting all those chemicals on my scalp.) I hope you’ll stick with this long enough to judge how YOU feel about it, no matter what others say, Nicki.

Nicki

December 2, 2012

That’s my hope Carmela, to ultimately be the “decider.” I think my Grandma had pretty good hair going gray, my other Grandma was brunette until the day she died. She swore she never colored it. Either she’s able to keep a secret or I didn’t get that gene!

Lee Parker

December 2, 2012

I love the idea! It’s inspiring me to do the same. I hate the time and expense. and I only highlight. So I can’t wait to see how it goes!

Nicki

December 3, 2012

I love inspiring! Stay tuned Lee!

Lisa Gangi

December 3, 2012

I’m with you 100%, Nicki! I think it can be elegant and beautiful. And think of how many salt & pepper (or even 100% gray) men look MORE refined and sexy because of it — and the same goes for women, too.

Nicki

December 3, 2012

Lisa, I wish I could say the same goes for women, unfortunately though you and I believe otherwise, from the Q&A that I’ve done, women find gray far more attractive on men and more matronly on women. Again, I think it’s all in the style and shade. Perhaps for men, it’s the fact that there’s not the pressure to hang tight to youth like it is for women. Darn those double standards!

Susan G

December 4, 2012

Like Carmela, I am also in the never colored my hair and letting it go gray camp, for some of the same reasons as Carmela too. Only you can add that I also just don’t want to spend the money either. The cost of coloring my hair at the stylist can pay for a very nice dinner out. A year’s cost could make for a nice weekend away. I would much rather spend my money on those things.
Carmela’s last sentence is right on the money.

I will add that for me there will also be no botox, face lifts, etc. I am fine with who I am and fine with aging. I will be 50 next year and am happy for that. I think we should embrace aging and do it gracefully, not try to deny it is happening.

Nicki

December 4, 2012

Susan, I’m with you. I think if we embrace age and the natural process, vs. trying to fight it at every turn is to age gracefully.

[…] Will the color be a gorgeous gray or the mousy kind? If it’s mousy, can I bail out of this  whole experiment? It’s my […]