One of the things I love about moving forward in the game of life is the realization that learning NEVER ends. When I was younger, I believed that wisdom came to “old people” when they knew all they could about others. Fast forward, I’ve come to know that wisdom is learning about yourself. You cannot possibly offer compassion, understanding, kindness, forgiveness to others if you cannot give it to yourself. Sadly, for too long I thought giving myself grace was selfish. Now I am convinced wisdom is permission to give ourselves grace, to accept and love ourselves, scars and all.
Wisdom has taught me that I cannot possibly give grace if I’m consumed with judging myself and others, I simply cannot. If I’m trapped in judgement mode it delays coming face-to-face with my truth. It prevents me from doing the work needed to understand myself more compassionately. When I am able to do that, doing it with others comes much easier.
There’s a reason why typically, wisdom comes later in life, we’re able to make space for it. During our younger years we’re so busy trying to do all the things we believe will make us whole, complete, and satisfied. We later learn many of those things simply fed our ego. This isn’t a bad thing, it’s a life thing. It’s tough to discover wisdom if you don’t go through all the “stuff” the icky stuff, the hard stuff and painful stuff. It’s all part of our tapestry and accruing wisdom.
At this stage of life, I know that I don’t have all the answers. I haven’t figured life out, and I certainly don’t get a pass on dealing with hard things that are part of life at any age. I’m simply more aware of giving myself and others more grace, that’s wisdom.
One last thought. For so long I wanted to be wisdom-filled. I thought it would be an a-ha moment and like magic, I’d be full of wisdom. Spoiler alert, wisdom doesn’t just drop itself in our lap. Nope, it’s too smart for that. Wisdom comes to us slowly and methodically so we’re able to recognize it, give it the space it needs to make ourselves and the world better.
How has wisdom shown itself to you?
Thinking out loud,
Nicki