Nicki Anderson

Sally Field Made Me Do It! Gray Expectations 11

By Nicki On February 10, 2013 Under Aging Gracefully, Gray Expectations, Healthy Aging
67 years and nay a gray!

67 years and nay a gray!

Have you seen Sally Field lately? Well, here she is! Holy cow, at 66 the woman looks fantastic! I recently saw her on Ellen and I couldn’t believe it was her. Of course the first thing I noticed was- no gray.

Like Sally Field, I  am petite. At barely 5’2″ I can’t help but feel that contributes to looking younger than my 51 years. Sally Field is 5’3″ and looks no where near her 66 years. That and the combination of hair color definitely shaves off a few years.

Aside from no sign of gray (yes, I’m sure she colors it) she is vibrant, fit and easily looks 20 years her junior even on HDTV!

At the risk of slighting my lovely gray haired friends, I have to say that if she were gray she may not have caught my attention. I was really amazed at how youthful she looked and how she carried herself. I believe it is a total package. If you’re dying your hair, but feeble and unable to get around, you age yourself. If you’re gray, fit and energetic, you don’t. However, if gray doesn’t compliment you, no matter how fit you are, it will indeed age you. I’m experiencing that right now.

Therefore, I have to acquiesce to those who said gray hair does make you look older. I am beginning to believe it’s true, regardless of health, activity and energy. But here’s what is interesting, I’ve learned that my gray haired friends are not interested in the looking younger piece, they simply like the way they feel with their gray locks. And the same holds true for those who color their hair, they simply like the way they feel.

A quote by Yves Saint Laurent, “I have always believed that fashion was not made only to make women more beautiful, but also to reassure them, give them confidence.”  I believe this statement holds true for hair color.

So here’s my deal, I am so not a quitter. At times I can be annoyingly tenacious. Therefore, the decision to go back to coloring my hair leaves me feeling a bit vulnerable. First, I worry I may not have given the experiment of going completely gray a fair shot. So how do I really know? Trust me, I know.

Enough gray to know.

Enough gray to know.

One of my readers wrote, “Nicki it’s winter, no one looks good in the winter.”  Though I agree with her comment, I’d like to make the most of the winter blahs by doing something which elevates my self-confidence versus squashing it. Gray isn’t it,  for me anyway.

Second, I despise losing. And somehow I feel like I’m losing by not seeing this whole thing through. However at the end of the day, I set the challenge and went in to it blind and excited. Four months later, my sight is back and  excitement has waned. Conclusion? My experiment, my choice to change my mind.

So, yes, yes I’m giving up. I’m throwing in the towel (insert dramatic sob here). I’m back tracking on my journey. But wait, here’s the great part, I have not gone through this process in vain. I have garnered some gray-t insight. Here’s what I’ve learned.

  • Never make a year long commitment public. It’s like posting you’re going to lose 25 pounds and someone sees you downing a chocolate shake. It sucks to get called out.
  • No two people look the same- in anything! I have a whole new appreciation for gray haired women who wear it well and with confidence.
  • Pay attention to what makes you feel good whether it’s wearing a certain color, certain clothing or hair style.  How you feel about yourself (regardless of what others think) can alter the course of your day!
  • Whatever you wear, wear it with confidence.
  • I needed a haircut!
  • I don’t look good in gray- clothing or hair color.

So, the next time I come up with some great idea or experiment, perhaps one of you will talk me down from the ledge. However, with every new endeavor comes life lessons and during the last 4 months, I’ve learned some pretty great lessons, connected with some great women, and learned color is a personal preference, not a moral decision. Here’s to your fabulous color, whatever it may be.

Here’s to never wishing for more time, rather making the most of it!

Nicki

 

6 comments - add yours
Susan Elizabeth Phillips

February 11, 2013

My dear Nicki, you seem to have forgotten something. This was never supposed to be a win/lose, remember? It was supposed to be an experiment. And it is a Totally Successful experiment! You’ve learned. We’ve had lots of food for thought. Please don’t regret going public. That’s what made this so interesting. You rock! Loved the whole thing!

Nicki

February 11, 2013

Thank you Susan. You’re right. And you know what? If there hadn’t been a lesson of some sort learned, failed mission. That said, mission accomplished! Thank you for throwing that out there!

Martha

February 11, 2013

No failure, but the lesson learned. We really have no choice in embracing “age”, but we can do it as gracefully as Loreal will allow us to.

Nicki

February 11, 2013

As my daughter would say, “True that!” 🙂

Susan G

February 12, 2013

It’s a personal decision that is not right or wrong, just personal depending on the person.

Having never dyed my hair at all means I have nothing to compare it to, really. I have just gradually gone gray and it is gradually taking over more and more of my hair. (Probably about 25% now…) My grays do not make me feel old in any way shape or form. I feel younger than my age and am happy with that. And I would be ok with feeling my age too. I think the maintenance of dying hair (from a time and money standpoint, and the fact that other’s roots growing out irritate me) would stress me out more than just being gray.

I would imagine it would be much harder to make a change from dying to not dying than it is to just never start at all. So I think I will just continue with my resolve to go gray and not do the opposite experiment from yours.

Nicki

February 12, 2013

Susan G, you’re absolutely right. Going from color to gray is a little different. I love the fact that you are gracefully letting your hair do it’s thing! I bet you look fantastic in it. If you feel good, that’s all that matters!